Psychic Vampires are everywhere. As much as we try to quarantine ourselves from their influence, it is inevitable that we are going to have to deal with them, and sometimes even find ourselves in a position where we have one as a superior, at work or in other social environments.
This entry is spawned from a direct inquiry from a personal friend who is dealing with working in the shadow of one such vampire and what follows is my best advice for working around, and ultimately against, said Psychic Vampire. It has been slightly modified for readability in this format, but is otherwise in tact.
First, a psychic vampire is often very insecure. This insecurity manifests as over compensation, either in bearing or authority. Find out where these insecurities are and exploit them. Are they a functioning alcoholic? Marital problems? Unloved in their daily life?
Find these out and start to position yourself so that 1) These insecurities reflect in you. Don’t share them, but act like a mirror. and 2) so that you reflect these insecurities of them, to those around you.
For example, if he is a misogynist, and you are a female place yourself in a position so others can see him being a misogynist to you. This may sound like martyrdom, but you are actually rallying the sympathy of those around you. One of the FEW times martyrdom works. If you are a male, you can lure them into such things by insinuating “locker room” talk, but it is important you do not get branded the same label as well.
Next, if they are a direct superior, it is VITAL, you do not end up in their cross-hairs. As you work against them they will try to drag down whoever they can on their way out. Sometimes destroying you in their death knell.
In fact, kill them with kindness. If you can become the one person they trust with their secrets or see you as an ally despite their sinking position, you will be better able to seal the coffin when you bury them. This also puts you in a great position to sabotage them.
Try an act of kindness that will ingratiate them to you. A private moment where you bare a personal moment, this will encourage them to do the same, or a souvenir from a trip. Something they put on their desk or wall that reminds them of your kindness each day.
Don’t go over board, your ploy will be discovered if you come off too sappy.
Finally do not talk smack, gossip, or participate in “bitch sessions” about them. If it gets back to them you are part of that crowd, you’ll be seen as a faceless detractor and easier to cull or destroy.
It is important, if your master is strong, to never out shine them. In fact go to them with simple, stupid questions that you should know, and be THANKFUL for their help. People love to feel superior over others and if you concede thee moments, you’ll soon be right under his wing.
When their position weakens and they start their decline, start to distance yourself, then set yourself apart when they are weak, and above all do not kick them when they are down. This comes off as petty and anyone you may be in a position over when he is gone, will remember it and won’t trust you.
I present a personal anecdote which may help paint these lessons in a clearer light, please note that your mileage may vary on use of these techniques and one must be sure of their position before trying to undermine anyone else.
When I first started at my job I had a Level 3 (team lead) who liked to delegate work out. Which is fine, that’s a good skill, but he was known for heaping HIS own work in with the delegations, busy work, end of shift reports, data entry, etc. Things HE should have been doing but pushed off on others, most notably the new guy, me.
After a time when I got more confident, I asked him to take his work back, I had my own things to deal with and didn’t have time. Plus I had seen through his deception and wasn’t game for it anymore.
He refused, stating the old platitudes:”I see promise in you. I know you can do it. It helps out the team.” All the usual filler shit.
So I kept my head down and continued diligently.
After a time, once he was confident in my ability and that the reports I was sending were accurate, no longer needing checks, he started sending them to management without proofing them. He’d get my work, sign it as his own, and send it.
So I started screwing up the reports. Minor at first, transposing a number here or there. Eventually, I was just copying the report completely from the day before. Giving completely false sets of information.
When management caught on, seeing all these problems in the reports, they confronted him directly.
He was stuck in the spot of admitting he had been shoving the work off on someone else, or admitting he had been screwing up for over a month.
He bit the bullet and said it wouldn’t happen again.
When he confronted me, I pulled the “Oh my god I’m so sorry, it’s because I’m still so new” routine and apologized profusely. In the same stroke, showing he was superior, and ridding myself of the task.
He was fired a few months after, turns out, after not doing the reports for so long he continued to screw them up, and rather than ask for help, he let his pride seal the deal.
When the dust settled, I was elevated to that same position, and was diligent not to repeat the same mistakes.
For more information on the definition of Psychic Vampires, it is all well documented by Anton LaVey in “The Satanic Bible” and numerous other sources, including a previous entry in this very same blog, “Vampires Among Us“.
You can also view this video from my own “Satanic Seminar” series which delves into the very subject.